Concerned Mother: Daughter struggling with Math despite so many tuition classes

Dear Agony Aunt,

I hope this message finds you well. I am writing to you as a worried mother of a 9-year-old girl who is currently in primary school. My daughter has always been a bright child, but I’ve noticed that she has been struggling significantly with her mathematics studies.

Despite my efforts to help her, including enrolling her in several tuition classes, her confidence seems to be dwindling. She often feels frustrated and overwhelmed when faced with math homework, and I’ve seen her become anxious about the subject. I try to encourage her and remind her that it’s okay to struggle, but I’m at a loss as to how to effectively support her.

Do you have any advice on how I can help my daughter? I worry that her difficulties may affect her self-esteem and overall enjoyment of learning. Any insights you could offer would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you for your time.

Warm regards,

A Concerned Mother

Dear Concerned Mother,

Thank you for reaching out and sharing your concerns about your daughter. It’s completely understandable to feel worried when you see your child struggling, especially in a subject as foundational as mathematics.

First and foremost, it’s important to recognize that every child learns at their own pace. While it can be disheartening to see her facing difficulties, it’s vital to create a supportive environment where she feels safe to express her struggles without fear of judgment. Here are a few suggestions that might help both you and your daughter:

1. Communicate Openly: Have a chat with her about her feelings towards math. Understanding her perspective may give you insight into what specifically troubles her. Sometimes children may feel pressured to perform well, especially when they see peers excelling.
2. Focus on Understanding Over Grades: Rather than solely emphasizing the need to improve grades, encourage her to enjoy the process of learning. Use real-life examples and fun activities to illustrate math concepts—cooking, shopping, and even playing games can be great ways to make math more relatable and less intimidating.
3. Consider Different Learning Styles: Some children thrive with traditional teaching methods, while others may benefit from more visual or hands-on approaches. Explore various resources such as educational apps, online videos, or even interactive math games that cater to her learning style.
4. Limit Tuition If Necessary: It’s commendable that you’ve sought extra help, but sometimes too much pressure from tuition can lead to burnout. Consider taking a break and letting her explore math without the stress of formal classes.
5. Engage With Her Teachers: Don’t hesitate to reach out to her teachers for feedback. They can offer valuable insights into her performance in class and might suggest additional resources or strategies tailored to her needs.
6. Celebrate Small Wins: Celebrate her progress, no matter how small. Positive reinforcement can boost her confidence and motivation to tackle math challenges.

Remember, anxiety surrounding a subject often stems from a fear of failure. By fostering a nurturing and understanding environment, you’ll help her build resilience and a positive attitude towards learning.

Wishing you and your daughter all the best on this journey. If the struggles persist, consider consulting a professional educator or child psychologist who specializes in learning difficulties.

Warmest regards,

Agony Aunt