Worried Mother: Daughter wants to go home by herself after school

Dear Agony Aunt,

I am writing to seek your advice on a matter that has been weighing heavily on my mind. My daughter, who is currently studying in secondary school, has recently expressed her desire to start going home by herself after school. Up until now, I have always been the one to pick her up and ensure she gets home safely.

I am deeply concerned about her safety, especially when it comes to navigating the busy traffic in our neighborhood. I fear that she may not be able to handle unexpected situations or that she might be vulnerable to potential dangers while traveling alone. However, I also understand that she is growing up and wants to become more independent.

I am torn between wanting to protect my daughter and allowing her to gain independence. I would greatly appreciate any guidance or advice you could offer to help me navigate this delicate situation.

Thank you for your time.

Warm regards,
Worried Mother

Dear Worried Mother,

Thank you for reaching out to me with your concerns about your daughter’s safety after school. It is completely understandable that you are feeling torn between wanting to protect her and allowing her to become more independent.

Navigating the transition from being constantly supervised to gaining independence can be challenging for both parents and children. It’s important to have open and honest conversations with your daughter about your worries and establish some ground rules to ensure her safety.

You could consider creating a safety plan together, which includes walking routes to follow, safe places to wait if she feels uncomfortable, and guidelines for crossing streets or interacting with strangers. Encouraging her to carry a fully charged phone and informing you of her whereabouts can also provide you with peace of mind.

Additionally, you may want to explore alternative transportation options such as walking with friends or utilizing school bus services if available. Ultimately, fostering trust and communication with your daughter is key to ensuring her safety while allowing her to gain independence.

Remember that it’s okay to feel anxious about letting go, but empowering your daughter to make informed decisions and equipping her with the necessary tools can help alleviate some of your worries. I wish you and your daughter all the best as you navigate this new chapter together.

Take care,

Agony Aunt